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I REALLY Want to Be MORE THAN "Just Friends"
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Dear Dr. TRuth,
There is this guy I know who I really have liked alot for over a
years time, and I know he doesn't feel the same way for me.
He really just
wants to be friends.
And I understand. I respect the way he feels.
So I asked him, if we could just become better friends.
You know, hang out more,
talk more. And he said, Yes. He said he would be a better friend,
because before, he never had time.
So I kept trying to make plans with him. I just wanted to hang out
with him. And all of a sudden he says he thinks I will think
of it as more than friends.
I told him I wouldn't but
I don't know what to do, because I adore him. I need him for a friend.
But we are in an argument, and he won't listen to me.
How am I supposed to make this better?
I don't know what to tell him. Now he doesn't even want to be
my friend.
I don't think I can tell him I need him, because he really
doesn't act like he wants me as a friend. And it hurts a lot.
Please help me with what I should tell him or how I should solve this.
Thanks a lot.
Sincerely,
A Friend
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Dear "Friend"
I wish I had better news for you but you are just
going to have to get your pride back.
Leave this guy
alone!
If he doesn't want to hang out with you, it
is his loss!
Never chase someone who runs away from
you.
All your letter tells me is that you need more
self-esteem. You may indeed adore him but, if he
doesn't feel this way, spending more time with him is
only going to get painful.
Take him at his word. If
he doesn't like you "that way" he is only going to
hurt you more.
If he is ignoring you, stay aloof.
Be
friendly to everyone but him.
In the meantime, work
on feeling more confident. Get in shape, do well in
school, take up activities which make you happy, and
spend time with people who want to be with you.
This
situation is self-destructive and damaging to your self
esteem.
We need to work on building it, not tearing
it down.
Believe me, that is much more
important than giving away your power and sense of
self to someone who doesn't really care!
Sincerely,
Dr. TRuth
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